Left Coast Dating

Check the boxes below and find your agave:


Politics:
___Trump — I’d rather put a gun barrel in my mouth.
___Trump — I’d rather put a gun barrel in — “US Secret Service, may we speak with you?”


Age:
___I’m 8 in dog years though, strangely, my dog is still more mature.
___My chronological age is 52 but my chakra vibrates at a jailbait-y 16.
___It’s just a number — a number you’re not going to like.


Diet:
___Rooted in the dirt
___Dangling from a tree
___Anything that moves


Exercise:
___I sat on my ass for the last eight years, maybe it’s time to do something.
___Does throwing Molotov cocktails burn many calories?
___I like to hike to the top of the mountain and take selfies while looking into the deplorable abyss between NYC and LA.

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